Every year so far for Meredith’s birthday, Kris has taken the day off and we’ve gone and done something fun. The first two years were mostly for us, and we chose to go to Salt Spring Island as we thought the boat ride and subsequent wandering would be fun for her even while young.

This year, we asked her what she wanted to do, and she chose a boat ride. We thought we’d do something different this year and go out to Sidney Spit. However, the morning of I thought to check prices, and we realized that the cost was almost $20 for each of us, including Fiona! It occurred to us that we could go over to one of the Gulf Islands again for cheaper than that, even with a vehicle, and that there would probably be more to do. We decided to pick a different one, and so Mayne Island it was. Click on thumbnails to see larger pictures.

So of course, a boat ride started off the day. Meredith was really excited to be on a big boat. We met a neat family from Quebec who had a daughter around Meredith’s age. The girls played most of the ride while we chatted with the parents. The mom kept commenting on how nicely Meredith played and what a great sharer she was, and asked if she was in daycare.

Once on Mayne Island, we stopped by a local grocer for a couple of things we’d forgotten to bring, then drove to a park area the family we’d met had recommended for a picnic. Meredith had a blast on the nearby playground and we sat and enjoyed the quiet and ate our lunch.

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Then Meredith discovered the zipline, which brought a whole new level of fun to the day in her eyes. It’s not obvious from these pictures, but this thing went FAST. And she didn’t want Kris to actually hold on to her, so he just had his hands hovering around her. He had to run to keep up. At the end it kind of jerked to a stop and he’d catch her if she fell, but for the most part she was just fine on her own. She wanted Kris and I to each try too, and I’m impressed how well she held on. I found it difficult myself.

Near where we had our picnic was a huge Japanese garden that we decided to visit afterwards. The garden was planted and maintained as a way of commemorating the Japanese families who had settled on the island and been interned during World War II.

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Afterwards, we headed back to the ferry and home. It was a long and busy day, and Fiona was tuckered out.

I had baked Meredith a dairy-free chocolate-orange crumb cake. We served it to her when we got home but she was more interested in cutting paper. I asked her to take just one bite, for the camera, and so she took a tiny little bite and stuck it in her mouth, then asked for some peaches and went right back to cutting her paper. So Kris and I enjoyed the cake instead.

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The weather was beautiful most of the trip, though on Friday banks of fog kept rolling in throughout the day. No rain though, so that’s good. It means we’ve still never been on a rainy Tofino trip, quite an accomplishment I think! Here are some pictures from the weekend. I didn’t want to bring my good camera on to the beach (though I did once) and we don’t have a point and shoot, so the majority of these pictures are taken with a cell camera.

Meredith on the beach. You can see the cabins we stayed in behind her.

The fog rolling in

Taking a break from building sand castles and splashing in the water

Meredith had a blast climbing on these rocks.

Here's to give you some idea of the height. At least twice as tall as my head. Kris is trying to get her to put her hands up in victory after climbing.

She would need a little bit of help coming down, but then she would just turn around and climb right back up again. She was really good at finding hand and foot holds and would try out different routes up. It was neat to watch. She was pretty fearless too. Here she took off up the rock before Kris was even remotely ready for it lol.

The fire isn't really a raging, out-of-control bonfire; camera phones just don't have great shutter speeds. Meredith kept signing and saying "hot" and trying to blow on it.

I have more pictures and other places that we went, but I don’t want to make this post too long so I’ll split the rest into another post.

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Some of my potatos were looking ready to harvest, and after seeing Kyre’s I was really excited to see what mine looked like. I was disappointed to find nothing but tiny tiny potatoes, smaller than a marble. I only pulled one up, so I’m just going to water the heck out of the rest of them and hope for the best. They didn’t get covered nearly as high as they should have been, because I ran out of dirt and the dirt was getting so high it was falling off anyway.

Some things are doing really well though. I harvested broccoli last weekend. We had sticky chicken with fresh broccoli and peas from the garden. It was really rewarding to eat food that I grew.

There's already more broccoli ready to harvest back there.

Cherry tomatoes starting to fruit

Roma tomatoes

The butterfly flower garden, with my sunflowers in the back. I've seen tons of butterfly and bumblebees here already.

Delicata squash flowering

Corn and beans. The corn isn't growing as tall as fast as I'd hoped, so I have to stake all the beans. I haven't done that yet.

Snap peas

Zucchini

In other news, we’re off to beautiful Tofino and the west coast of the island for a few days with Kris’ dad and little brother. I’m really looking forward to it. I’ve been starting to feel a little queasy in the evenings though, so I really hope the actual nausea can hold off until after we get back. I’ll probably have lots of pictures when we get back. For those who have never been, it’s a beautiful place. It rains a lot though, or so I’ve heard. I don’t think it’s ever rained when we’ve gone, so hopefully our luck holds out this time too.

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First, Meredith is doing wonderfully. She seems to be going through a learning spurt right now. It seems that she says a new word we haven’t heard her say before every day. She has so many new abilities, she’s even counting a little bit and seems to recognize some letters and colours. Though we don’t drill her on any of these things, so I couldn’t say for sure. I think she is on the verge of potty training. If we leave her diaperless, she will often go and sit on the potty of her own accord to pee or poo. With diapers on, she still doesn’t signal before she goes, but we’re definitely getting there. She has started sitting her doll on the potty or toilet and making our “psss” sound for peeing though, and then pointing and clapping for the doll. It’s really cute.

She finally got her eighth front tooth last week, and I think she may still be teething this week. She’s nursing pretty much constantly. It’s actually really starting to wear on me. She was up every hour or two through the last couple of nights nursing (prior to that she slept 6-8 hours in a row most nights) and it seems during the day I can’t sit down to relax without her wanting to come join me and nurse. Don’t get me wrong, I love our nursing relationship, but it is hard some days. And while most days if I don’t feel like nursing at the time she asks she is okay accepting food or a drink or play and cuddling as a substitute, these last couple of days she hasn’t been at all. I remind myself that there is a reason, whether I’m aware of that reason or not, and that the times she needs it most are not the times to refuse her. We’d been discussing how she’d gotten tall and thin, so it’s possible that it’s because she is growing out now, or maybe it’s just all the learning she’s been doing recently.

We went to Calgary for a visit with family a few weeks ago, and it went really well. My parents have been separated since the beginning of April, and it was obviously a good thing that should have happened years ago. They are both so much happier and more pleasant to be around. The trip was a bit of a whirlwind, trying to fit in so many people in just 7 days. We drove both ways, though I think until Meredith (and any other children we have in the future) are a bit older, we may fly from now on. The ride wasn’t actually that bad either way, but twelve hours stuck in a car, even with breaks, is a lot to ask of anyone, let alone a two year old. We did do most of the driving at night, but even still.

Now, we are currently dogless. We left Tipsy in Calgary with my mom. Part of me is sad and I miss her, but I have to be honest and say that mostly I feel relieved that she’s in a home where she seems much much happier, and is doing so much better. I volunteered at the SPCA for seven years in my teens and used to scorn anyone who would rehome a dog, so I never thought I would do it. I don’t think I would still ever dump an animal at the SPCA where I don’t know what would happen to it or where it would go though. Reactions when I tell people range from “It’s about time, that dog was neurotic”, to “I wondered when you were going to find her a new home”, to “When are you getting another one?”. lol, unfortunately for her, it doesn’t seem she was well thought of around here, which is too bad because she is a very sweet, friendly little dog when she’s comfortable and happy. Anyone who knows her really well actually really loves her. But she also had neurological problems and fear aggression, and because of the two combined wasn’t very trainable in some ways. We got her from a breeder who was ill, and she was the only puppy in her litter, and so for the first 6 months of her life she grew up completely unsocialized.

We didn’t walk Tipsy except at night because she was aggressive and stressed with other dogs or people around. We are the type of dog owners who want to be able to give a dog an inch and not worry about it. We want to be able to let a dog run ahead on the leash and sniff sometimes, come up on the furniture, go first out the door, sleep in our bed, get free love, etc. We are the type of owners who have a dog to be his companion and friend, not his master. Tipsy was the type of dog who if you gave her an inch, she’d take a mile, and then try and take more. We had to make sure she knew we were dominant, or she would get stressed and nervous. When new people visited, she often had to be locked in her kennel or she’d be a nervous wreck. There’s so much more I could say about her, but I don’t want to go into all the reasons we had for giving her to my mom, suffice it to say that she is doing wonderfully there, in a quieter home with a very friendly, submissive dog, and it really makes any guilt and heartache we had over the decision dissipate. My mom had a dog pass away two summers ago, and her current dog has been in mourning ever since. He loves having another dog around too and Tipsy is learning about doggy communication from him, so it’s a good partnership.

All that being said, we (and by that, I mean mostly me, though Meredith has gone looking for her a few times) really miss having a dog around. But I’m being picky about any new dog we get. He/she has to be friendly, good with kids, confident, trainable, friendly… Because I stay at home, I have lots of time to spend with a dog, but I want to spend that time having fun and going for walks, not constantly correcting behaviours or trying to change bad habits. We weren’t really in a rush, but I put out a few feelers to some local rescue groups, and as it turns out we may end up adopting one sooner rather than later.

Kris got his tonsils out last week. He’s been in a lot of pain this week. He had obstructive sleep apnea, and neither of us were getting much sleep because of it. It caused other problems too, like he has always had problems breathing through his nose. He went to an ENT who recommended a tonsillectomy. He got a second opinion from our GP, who is very holistic, and a naturopath. Both gave some suggestions on things to try, but after looking at his throat said his tonsils were some of the biggest they’d ever seen. (He also had a hygienist say the same thing to him without being asked.) He went on an elimination diet for 13 weeks, which did seem to be helping a little. He was snoring less at least, but he still wasn’t getting a good night’s sleep or breathing easier, so when we got a call that the surgery had been scheduled he decided to go ahead with it. It’s too early to tell if it fixed the sleep apnea, but we’re hopeful. He’s been drinking a lot of green smoothies and other cold, soft foods.

This weekend we’re heading out again, this time just for a short plane ride to Kelowna though, for Kris’ grandmother’s funeral. She was 95 and had lived a good life, so I think it will be more a celebration of her life than a mourning of her passing. Hopefully, Kris will be feeling well enough by then to go.

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We’ve looked at some other cars. We could wait until Kris gets his bonus and buy a nice, not-too-old car, probably an American one because they’re cheap. We’ve looked at a couple of really cheap cars we could buy now though. We went and saw a Mercury Sable last night. It’s older, but has relatively low mileage for the year and it was actually in really good condition. We weren’t able to test drive it though, because it isn’t insured and the roads have been so bad here. But we turned it on and had a look at everything. I think he’s going to arrange insurance so we can go back and see it maybe this weekend. We just want something that will be safe and run reliably for 3 or 4 years until we’re out of debt and can save up to buy something really nice outright. Like maybe a couple year old Accord or Camry. Or maybe a minivan.

We’re actually going to look at a Grand Caravan today too. It’s a 2005 but has a 170,000 km. It was used as a work vehicle for a salesperson. He says it’s been extremely well maintained and it’s pretty cheap. I’ve read that minivans are wonderful even with just one kid. Easy to diaper change and get in and out of. Great for trips. But I’m not sure I’m ready for a minivan yet. Plus, I think people would read too much into it. :p But we’ll look. You never know, maybe we’ll fall in love. There are other Grand Caravans that are cheaper and older but less km. I’m not sure if it’s better to go for newer and higher mileage or older and less mileage. Kris is thinking the newer and higher is better as long as it’s been well maintained. It will probably suck gas too. We’ll go look anyway. We thought at first it was missing a 1 from in front of the price because all the other ones from that year are $8-$10,000 more, but then we noticed the mileage. 

One of the things we decided when selling our car was that if we bought an older car and weren’t comfortable using it for trips, we could always rent and still pay less than our monthly payments on our current car. So even if we end up with a smaller car we could always rent a minivan for longer drives.

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I could write about the barbecue we had on Saturday for Meredith’s birthday. It was a lot of fun, some of my favorite family from Vancouver showed up as well as some friends and one of Kris’ coworkers. Meredith had a blast and my cousin (who works with young children) and her boyfriend spent a lot of time playing with her, which meant I could sit and relax and chat with people without worrying. That was nice too. I wish that particular cousin (or any of my cousins from that family really) lived on the island, because I’d definitely be comfortable with her as a babysitter eventually.

Or about going to Nanaimo yesterday to visit with Annie, Paxye, and another friend of ours. It was the first time I’d ever met Paxye in real life and it was so neat to actually be able to meet her and her boys and husband and talk with them. Meredith was full of beans and kept wandering outside when everyone else was in or inside when everyone else was out but she seemed to be having fun. We went to a great park with a scary slide, and later to a lake, though Meredith was too sleepy to enjoy the beach much.

Or maybe I should talk about the job offer Kris got, and then declined. Turns out, his current company is a lot more competitive than we thought they were. While the job offer did involve a raise, it wasn’t substantial and their RRSP contributions are far less than the current job, meaning overall only about a 3% raise. Since Kris is expecting a 5-10% raise in November (based on a recent review) from his current job, moving would actually mean a decrease in pay.

I could mention the doctor’s appointment. I actually never intended to do well-baby checks, and haven’t done as many as most people do, but when her first doctor tried to bully me into having her checked by a pediatrician (they only look after sick babies here) because Meredith has a small head for her age, I left that doctor. I wasn’t really worried about whether we even had a doctor or not since there’s always the walk-in clinics, but then I heard of a holistic MD accepting patients and made an appointment. Having a doctor who supports us not vaccinating, extended breastfeeding, delaying solids, cosleeping, etc, is actually kind of a relief. I like knowing that if something were to come up, there is someone in the medical profession who won’t spend her time trying to bully me into vaccines (like I’ve heard happens to other parents) rather than dealing with the real issue at hand. This doctor actually works full time as an instructor in the yoga studio she owns; being a doctor is just a part time thing she does on the side. She’s also fully supportive of my not coming back in for any more well-baby checks and just making appointments if I have concerns.

I’m tired today though. I think instead of talking about any of those, I’ll just go have a nap with my baby.

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It was fantastic though. We had lunch at a great little cafe, wandered around, ate frozen yogurt, and explored the shops, and found a private little area where we rested and read while Meredith napped. We caught the bus back to the ferry, had a little snack in the restaurant and then back on the ferry again.

Back at home:

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Second, the wedding was so much fun. I only wish the weekend could have been longer. Unfortunately, because it’s a bit of a drive, we really only had one full day there. We didn’t get there until 5pm Friday night and had to leave at 11am Sunday. But I loved seeing my family and my cousins. The wedding was a beautiful, outdoor ceremony and my cousin was stunning.

Meredith was friendly and social as usual. (I love that my mom thinks I’m making her antisocial by cosleeping, and yet comments constantly about how happy and friendly she is. Does she think it has absolutely nothing to do with my parenting? Or maybe she says differently about us behind my back?) She (Meredith, not my mom) did get a really bad diaper rash Saturday evening, and started acting clingy. Even though we changed her frequently, I think she’s not used to being in diapers that much, especially not the PUL (plastic) covers, since she’s generally coverless/diaperless at home and we use wool overnight. She got extremely fussy (very unusual for her), so we took her upstairs to our room. Her bum was super red and I touched it and she started to scream. We put some rash cream on it and I gave her a small dose of baby Motrin. I try to use it very sparingly (I think we’ve only used it once before, for teething), but stuck in a hotel in the mountains at 8 o’clock at night I didn’t feel we had a lot of other options besides just letting her be in pain. We also started just using the wool covers and not using the plastic ones. I had hesitated to use them because some of them are borrowed and she often has poo blowouts when we travel, but I do have some of my own this time so I used those. I imagine babies in disposables must be really uncomfortable with this heat if one day of plastic gave Meredith a diaper rash that bad. Anyway, the Motrin and nursing seemed to help, and we went back down to the reception just in time for the speeches.

Meredith has been taking steps for a while now, but just this past week she actually started walking. Now already, she prefers to walk rather than crawl. It seems like it happened overnight. She wants us to help her still though, even though she can walk on her own. (She even ran down the hallway last night!) So when we got down to the wedding again, she grabbed Kris’ fingers and pulled him around. He was trying to be discreet and just stay low and let her walk around the tables, but she decided to lead him onto the dance floor in the middle of my cousin’s speech (the bride). She stopped her speech to call out: “Meredith! I can’t believe you’re walking!” And then my aunt yelled “Kris! You and Meredith are not supposed to be the first dance.” (All in good fun. My aunt is like a second mom to me and adores Meredith.) She also made friends with another little girl there (who is three) and they crawled around together for a while. We got some really sweet pictures of them. Then I put her in the mei tei and she fell asleep, so we stuck around for part of the dancing. A testament to baby wearing for sure, since we didn’t have to leave when she got tired. Her diaper rash was mostly cleared up by the next day and it’s gone now.

Our next big thing is Meredith’s birthday in a week. Kris is taking the day off and we’re planning on taking the ferry over to one of the islands and spending the day either touring the islands, or just picking one island and staying there all day. We haven’t really decided yet, but it’s something we’ve discussed doing for several years and never done yet. I had also wanted to buy a tree and plant it in our yard for Meredith, but I’m not sure I want to do anything like that until we have our own house. We’re having a barbecue with friends the weekend after too. I didn’t want to go overboard for a first birthday, but I think doing our own family thing the day of and then having some friends for a barbecue at a nearby park on the weekend will be a lot of fun.

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My dad doesn’t understand how I could not want to put her down in a separate room, I don’t understand how he could. If I need to get stuff done, I put her in our mei tei and she sleeps while I get stuff done. Today, I just wanted to sit and hold her and read my e-mails.

She stirred a few times to nurse or shift positions. She was sucking slowly when she woke up for good. Her eyes opened and went immediately to my face. I was watching her, and she gave me a huge grin. She always smiles at me if she sees me watching her when she wakes up.

I cherish my time holding her. Now that she has started crawling, she doesn’t want to be held all the time anymore. She spends far more time on the ground than in arms. My parents think she is going to be insecure and never be independent. I’m not worried. And besides, interdependence is more important to me than independence.

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